Now drink Irish beer. We like Guinness because the bubbles go the wrong way.
If you don’t have Irish beer and you’re too drunk to drive to the store, we can help.
1 Glass of Beer
2 Drops Green Food Coloring (or one drop of yellow and one drop of blue)
Several Irish Toasts
Put 2 drops of green food coloring in your glass of beer. Slur your words, make an Irish Toast, drink, and repeat.
Appropriate Irish Toasts:
“May you get to heaven a full half hour before the Devil knows you’re dead.”
“May the holes in your net be no larger than the fish in it.”
“May you live to be a hundred years with one extra year to repent.”
“May you live as long as you want, and never want as long as you live.”
“May the tap be open when it rusts.”
Last but not least:
“Slainte!” (pronounced “Slawn-cha” meaning “Health!”)